ZZZzzzzzzz. What? I haven’t written a blog in a few weeks? Yeah, about that . . .

My over-achieving a$$ decided to go back to school. Maybe the the third time’s a charm for finding the perfect degree. Meanwhile, I got pneumonia. For the past two weeks, I’ve been battling pneumonia and the beginning of the school year. Wooo-weeeee!

This is tough, y’all. I can’t tell whether my fatigue is from class or from being sick, but all I’ve wanted to do for the past two weeks is curl up in a warm bed and sleep. It’s incredibly inconvenient to be sick at the start of the school year, especially when your classmates and professors don’t know you and think you’re this pale sickly thing who can’t hack it. “No, no!” I want to shout. “I’m not usually like this! The lethargy? The cough? The cadaverous complexion? It’s not who I am! Well, that last bit about being pale is pretty consistent!” Instead, I flop. I’m floppy. I flop into Teams meetings and then I flop on the couch. I flop into bed. I flop into my car. A cough will animate me for a spell, then I’ll flop once more. Someone took all my juice, and I want it back.

Boychild told a passing stranger that his mom was sick and coughing a lot. Husband hastily explained that I did not have COVID. How do I know I don’t have COVID? My college has been incredibly thorough in testing the students weekly, so I’ve had three COVID tests so far and all were neggo. The first test was before we came back to campus. We had to spit in a tube. And when I say “spit in a tube,” I mean we had to fill the dang thing to the brim. This is harder that you’d think, because only spit counts. No spit foam. Plus, the spitting had to be supervised on Zoom. Yes, I had the unique experience of having a young man watch me awkwardly spit into a vial for about two minutes. I’m sure there are corners of the internet where people do this for money.

It’s funny how cough habits die hard. Yesterday in a Zoom meeting, I covered my cough with the crook of my arm and my colleague said, “why’d you do that? You’re alone!” Yep. I’ve noticed I also do the “vampire cough cover” when I’m in the car or wearing a mask, which is entirely ridiculous.

The worst part about the past two weeks has been watching Husband and Boychild have adventures without me. They’ve been to the beach, the gardens, on hikes. While I . . . well, I’ve been to bed. But I am getting much better, thanks to giant antibiotics and plenty of love and care from my little family.

But I don’t want to be all “poor me” in this post. I’m alive. I’m lucky. I have a great support system and health insurance. I’m doing really well.

I’ll be done with school in a few years, so I might be a bit busy these days. At least til May. Over summer break, I think I’ll start a website where you can watch me spit in a tube for $50.